Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Great Friends, Great Advice

One of the main reasons I find this blog so rewarding is being able to meet amazing women along the way- women that I never ever ever ever would have met otherwise. This, in and of itself, has been a GIGANTIC blessing in my life.

Meet my friends Allie and Julie- they are sisters. Aren't they just glowing?

If you recognize Julie (in the red), it's because she wrote her inspiring story for the My Name Is Series. If you haven't read it, do!

What's so cool about this whole thing is that one day, a few weeks ago, I received an email from Allie ( in the blue). She had found my blog via one of her friends on Facebook and had been reading along for a while when she felt the need to email me, telling me about her sister and the journey she had been on.

From that moment on, we pretty much all became internet friends. I instantly felt like these ladies were my very close friends, even though we had never met.

Well yesterday, we finally decided to meet up and it was AWESOME! 3 hours whizzed by... our kids rambunctiously played in the basement... and we just chatted... and chatted... and chatted... about love and life and hardships and everything in the middle.... and before I knew it, it was time to go home.

We said our goodbyes, hugged and promised to keep in touch.

Then on the way home I got a text from sweet Julie.

"I was going to tell you one other thing... call me when you get a minute!"

I called her right then and as I drove down 1-15, she gave me some of the BEST advice I've heard in a long while (and I'm paraphrasing her words):

"The 'easy' card you used to have (or thought you had) is gone."

She was silent for a second.

"I've told this to my widow friends, my divorced friends, and my friends who are going through tough stuff. Again, your easy card is gone. It's not in the deck for play anymore and it is never coming back into your hand. Blending families is hard. Second marriages are hard.  But, with hard things can also come so much happiness! And when those happy and good moments shine through, they outweigh every bit of what you went through and all the love and happiness that you feel is magnified."

I sat in my car and I felt such a strong feeling of resonating conviction.

"So..." she said,

"When challenging circumstances arise, instead of thinking, this is too hard for me to do... think, this may be really hard but I can still find happiness."


She is right.

Life isn't easy. Life SUCKS sometimes. Life is ridiculously AWESOME sometimes. My life had its hard parts before. My life has different hard parts now. This is just life. And what an amazing lesson Julie taught me yesterday... that from hardships come undeniably beautiful moments- and a beautiful life.

If Allie had never reached out to me, I would have never heard from her sister Julie... and if I never had heard from Julie, my life would be short of two very sincere new friends and some really concrete life-lessons. It was not a coincidence that our lives intertwined (for more reasons than one).

So, today I want to say thanks to all of you. A big thanks to Julie and Allie for yesterday (and to all of those who I have met because of this blog- you know who you are) and also a big thank you to all of you reading! This only works and is meaningful because of you. I don't have all the answers. I don't have all the right things to say all the time. To be honest, there are so many days when I feel like I'm running out of good, valuable material to write. But in those moments of feeling down, I always seem to learn something new from someone else that helps me in my life... and then I get to share it with you.

Thank you for reading. Thank you for being here. Thank you for your love and support. It means the world to me.



  1. Thank you for posting. I love your BLOG.

  2. Thank you for writing this Jacy. Today this was exactly what I needed to hear. My easy cards are gone and many times I want them back because I fear the hard journey before me. This definitely gives me courage -- we can do hard things!

  3. Jacy, I love the post. I love you! You are a courageous person to put your life out there for all of us to read and gain strength from everyday. I too am so grateful that we found each other. Thank you for the sweet things you said about me. Thank you for inspiring so many people! I have had so many great things happen because of doing your blog. I will be forever grateful I was able to do it and be a part of your blog. Thanks:)


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